so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
