i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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