nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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