My brain says no but my pants say off.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
