i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
