Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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