She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
