i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
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