How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
