people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize
