I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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