I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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