In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
