He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
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It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
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Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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