would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize