so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
