he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
not ubering you a puppy
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize