I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
she looked like the before picture.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
