her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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