hell yes lets make some ravioli
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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