No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
