Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
