Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
