You're my little dorito
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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