i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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