were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
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