sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
