You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
