6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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