i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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