the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
