yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize