Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
This is the high leading the old right now
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Randomize
