May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize