pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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