seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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