these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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