i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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