New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
