i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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