life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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