Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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