He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
