Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
