did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize