Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
