My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Randomize
