were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
