We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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