I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize