Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize